Random thoughts from a random mind

I don't suffer from randomness… I, obviously, quite enjoy it!!

Driving Reaction Test Involving Sheep

I hope the link works…I enjoyed this as I am a lover of sheep…and no sheep were hurt in the making of this.
I know all of you are very good drivers, so here is a fun test to see how good your speed is!
The driving manual says the average driver’s reaction time is .75 seconds or 1 car length for every 10 mph.
Test your average reaction time. Be careful, this can be addictive! You will be surprised at how slow you really are.
I don’t know how you did but I was rubbish.
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Here’s one for the male drivers

I have a GPS…

I have a little GPS
I’ve had it all my life
It’s better than the normal ones
My GPS is my wife

It gives me full instructions
Especially how to drive
“It’s thirty miles an hour”, it says
“You’re doing thirty five”

It tells me when to stop and start
And when to use the brake
And tells me that it’s never ever
Safe to overtake

It tells me when a light is red
And when it goes to green
It seems to know instinctively
Just when to intervene

It lists the vehicles just in front
And all those to the rear
And taking this into account
It specifies my gear.

I’m sure no other driver
Has so helpful a device
For when we leave and lock the car
It still gives its advice

It fills me up with counseling
Each journey’s pretty fraught
So why don’t I exchange it
And get a quieter sort?

Ah well, you see, it cleans the house,
Makes sure I’m properly fed,
It washes all my shirts and things
And – keeps me warm in bed!

Despite all these advantages
And my tendency to scoff,
I do wish that once in a while
I could turn the damned thing off.

Of course, I’m not like the wife in the poem…
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Just a quickie to make you smile.

A Kind-Hearted Cornishman.
A Cornisman and his wife walked past a swanky new restaurant.
“Did you smell that beautiful food?” she asked. “Incredible!”
He told her that it certainly was incredible.
Being the nice and kind-hearted Cornishman that he is, he thought,
“What the heck, I’ll treat her!”
So he turned her towards the front door…
they walked past it again…
What a treat.
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